Tag Archives: success

What Women Want

Thanks so much to those of you that answered the questions posed to you a few days ago.

Men

What do you want most from life?

What do you want from a woman – character wise?

Women

What do you want most from life?

What do you want from a man – character wise?

Before going any further I want to say something to you women.

“You Are Absolutely Fantastic!!!!”

Especially those on my bb. Your swift and detailed responses were superb!!

Just one question ladies

“Why did the majority of you start your answers with lol???”

Below are the results of my mini survey.

What women want most in life 

Happiness – 70%

Success in Business – 50%

Fulfilling purpose – 50%

What women want from men

Fear of God – 90%

Honesty – 80%

Drive and determination – 70%

Men

What Men want most from life

Peace – 80%

Happy Family – 30%

Fulfilling purpose – 30%

What men want most from women

Friendship – 70%

Make them a better person – 60%

Honesty – 60%

Let’s start with our adorable women.

Yep – I love you ladies. You’re all troopers!!

Happiness

I often wonder where true happiness comes from – on what or whom it depends on.

About a year and a half ago I asked myself the following question.

“Segs, what makes you happy?”

The answer was actually fairly simple – tennis, children, God, work, watching films – either cinema or dvds (I just love my series’!!!!), adventure holidays, family and friends – not necessarily in that order.

Though fairly straight forward I was surprised by how the simple things in life seem to be what make me happy. It revealed to me that many of the things that I was doing, or attempting to do in order to find excitement or happiness were a pointless exercise.

And there’s the rub.

Many of us spend so much time doing what everyone else is doing because we think that is what will make us happy. But in reality what will make you happy is most likely very different to what makes others happy. In other words we are all intrisically different – in  character and in DNA.

So stop doing things, or attempting to do things just because others are doing them.

If the world says that what makes you happy is boring then so be it!

Tell the world to take a hike. 

And don’t make the mistake of depending on other people to make you happy. That is both a futile and unfair burden on those around you.

It is interesting that most of us say ‘happiness’ and ‘purpose’ in the same breath.

The two are linked.

Once you know your purpose in life and start to walk in it, you will ultimately feel a lot happier about life – even in challenging times.
Nope. This is not an article about purpose so that’s enough on that point.

Just remember – happiness is very strongly linked to walking in your purpose.

Let’s proceed

“Let love and faithfulness never leave you, bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart”

Proverbs 3 vs 3

“Now I want you to realise that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.”

1st Corinthians 11 vs 3

A man’s biggest responsibility in life is to his God; to love and serve His God with all his heart, stength, and mind.

In other words to love Him faithfully – no matter what.

The man’s greatest mission in life is to fulfill the purpose that God set out for him.

Please note – God is perfect in love and therefore understands that women need to be loved.

Indeed He expects nothing less from the man – to love his partner.

“Husbands, love your wives”

The woman’s greatest mission is to be her husband’s helper.

“The Lord God said, “it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

Genesis

Note ladies – a helper ‘suitable’ for him – to help him fulfill his God given purpose.

Note chaps – “suitable for him”.

So when chosing a partner, ask yourself this question.

“Will this beautiful lady help me fulfill God’s purpose for me?”

If the answer is no then gird your loins (literally), take a bow, make your apologies, and leg it!

And ladies, when deciding whether or not to date a guy, ask him what he believes his purpose is.

Yep – ASK HIM NOW.

Who cares whether or not it’s too soon. You don’t have time to waste. Better to find out nice and early so that you both don’t waste each other’s time.

If he doesn’t know where he’s going then scarper.

If he does know where he’s going, but you’re not even vaguely interested in going there then scarper.

If he knows where he’s going and you believe in his mission and want to help him get there then he’s your guy.

What’s that saying?! You can tell a man / woman by his or her friends??

Hence the reason friendship comes up high on the list!!!!

Genesis 2 vs 18

Now this is where the challenge begins.

We live in an age in which women want to be equal to men – equal in power, equal in money, equal in influence, and equal in authority.

As much as I love the thought of this, it simply cannot work.

Please DO NOT misunderstand me.

I am not saying that women should be muppets for men to tread all over. I’m also not saying that women shouldn’t work or aspire to do great things.

Certainly not!!!

Remember – “husbands, love your wives” – listen to, take care of, respect their opinions and protect etc.

But so long as women embrace this new found liberation and equality which the world, aptly aided by the media, is feeding them, then relationships will continue to be fundamentally challenged.

Why?

Because most men want peace – peace of mind.

Peace of mind to follow their purpose – no matter what, and to be rest assured that their partner will support and help them – no matter what.

For a man to flourish – to fully focus and succeed in obeying and serving – oops!! – let me put this another way – –  for the man to fully succeed in this “fear of God” desire that ladies so desparately crave, he must be allowed to walk in His purpose – to obey and serve his God.

Ladies – you cannot desire or expect the man to ‘fear his God’ and at the same time challenge every decision he makes! If you do so, and he changes or dilutes his course then who is he actually fearing – God or you??

Remember ladies – you also want a man who is driven.

Am I making sense??

I really hope so.

I’m trying I’m trying!!!

Finally, men please take note – ladies want a man who ‘fears God’ and who is ‘driven’.
 
In other words a man who is determined to succeed in fulfilling his purpose.

The moment you start to dilute your course is the moment your partner starts to feel insecure and unsure.

So as my dear friend Dejoooo quite correctly stated, consistency is absolutely key.

Another dear friend of mine succinctly put it this way,

“We are gradually doing away with old fashioned values.”

I couldn’t agree more.

These old fashioned values that we are doing away with are the necessary ingredients to peace, unity and happiness in relationships.

The interesting thing is that we all know what we want; and deep down – beneath all the garbage that the world’s media has fed us, lies a deep and sincere desire for those very things that God placed in our hearts when He first created us.

This article really didn’t pan out the way it was supposed to.

It was supposed to be a funny article.

When I woke up at 2.30am (yep – finally realised that there’s a reason why I wake up in the middle of the night. Lol) and started writing what I thought would be a fun filled message I was shockingly led in a completely different direction.

I guess God had other ideas all along. Lol

It’s 5am in the morning.

I pray I’ve made sense.

Hopefully I can sleep now.

Tata.

©Segun Akande

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It’s Time

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Is it really that time of year again???

Is it really???

Feels like only a few days ago that I sat down to determine my dos’ and don’t s for 2012!!!

So what happened?

How did twelve months pass by with such lightening speed??? Continue reading

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